Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
