idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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