I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
