i don't like sucking hair
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
He had one of those small greek statue penises
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
