Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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