i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Randomize
