Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Randomize
