Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
