Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
he shaved USA in his pubs
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Randomize
