After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
