I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
