And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
