I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
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