I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Dignity is for republicans.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize