I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
