My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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