Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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