somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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