so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
