I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
