I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
