There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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