He kissed a someone with a penis
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
