am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Randomize
