btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
