his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
