I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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