on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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