he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize
