Hey man sorry I got all grabby
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
