Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
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