He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize