Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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