No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
