bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Life is so much better after having sex.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
