You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
