just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
you inspire me to be a worse person
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
