better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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