As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
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