whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize