we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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