I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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