I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
