scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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