wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
