Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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