Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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