So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
