Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
