Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Randomize